I finally watched "Milk"...

Oh, sweet baby jeebus...

I'd seen, and learned most of what I needed to learn, from the documentary. But today, my college sophomore wanted to watch the movie. She was home sick, and I have a bum shoulder this week, so I figured, what the hell, right?

I heard a lot of this gay-bashing growing up. Anita Bryant. Gay prejudice. You're going to hell-because-this-is-Texas-and-we-said-so. I mean, I knew I liked other girls in 71' - but I didn't really worry about it until I hit adolescence in 75'. Which, incidentally, was about the time Ole' Anita hit her peak.

Now, by 1977, Anita was on her way out. The gay establishment (and yes folks, some of our people were established by then) had begun the boycott that led to Anita's bad press and subsequent downfall. Her hatred was no longer profitable, so her sponsors dropped her, to minimize collateral damage.

But like that kid in the wheelchair who called Milk from Minnesota - we Texans were not privy to this new political awareness. Our state continued to live in the total dark ages, as San Francisco slowly oozed it's way out of the dank, musty cellar of homophobia.

Now, more than 30 years later, it's clear that San Francisco isn't completely out of the cellar. Prop 8, coming hours after the election of President Obama, made clear that we have miles to go before we sleep.

BUT! And this is a big 'but' - we have made inroads. Progress, even. While same-sex marriage is only officially recognized in a few states - Massachusetts, Connecticut, Iowa, Vermont, Maine and most recently New Hampshire - providing none of the anti-gay movements succeed in negating this progress - we have still made an impact.

But it's not enough. It's not enough for that teenage kid that everyone else KNOWS is gay - but is terrified to tell his or her parents. It's not enough for that kid debating substance abuse or suicide to deal with their pain. In short, it's just not enough, people.

No child should have to choose between living honestly with themselves, and pleasing their friends or family. What kind of choice is that?! One of my neighbors, whose child told my child that "by the time you believe in Jesus it will be too late" asked me how I would feel if "one of my kids came home a christian?" And I told her, after asking her how she'd feel if one of her kids came home and announced he's queer - I'd love them anyway! Just as I would expect her to do.

People focus too much on differences - especially when religion is involved. But if you take "god" out of the equation - we are all still people. And we all still need other people. We need our community - differences and all. As Harvey Milk tried desperately to teach them - we need each other.

But we cannot help each other if we focus on hate and differences. We have to focus on similarities, and love. And isn't that what anyone's 'god' is about? The concept of God is about love, that's what I have deduced. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe GOD is this hateful, spiteful, revengeful thing the popular right wing Christians keep talking about. I'd like to think they're wrong about that.

But whether it is or not, as an atheist, I don't have any investment in it. It is not my god. And the idea that my Civil Rights can be determined on the basis of their god - which is not mine - is highly offensive. I pay the same taxes. Should I not have the same rights? Have these people ever *heard* of the concept of separation of church and state?

The irony, to me, is that the same groups that carry signs depicting Obama as Hitler are the same people who would tell me that I am inferior due to my orientation. They, like Hitler - would judge me inferior because I differ from them. They have yet to demonstrate how they are better than me - in fact they seem to strive towards proving their inferiority - yet somehow, on a political playing field, I am determined "less than." All because they are "Christians."

I do not think these people are truly 'Christians'. Of course, it doesn't really matter what I think. The people I would consider "Christians" are not speaking out against the so-called 'Christians' who are doing their damnedest to make queer people - children and adults alike - feel inferior. They aren't making an effort to minimize suicides amongst queer teenagers. They aren't reaching out enough to their communities.

So why SHOULD I distinguish between the far conservative right nut-jobs who don't care if we kill ourselves, and the Christians who claim to care, yet do nothing?

If you care, stand up on this day - National Coming Out Day. Stand behind your mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, friends and neighbors. Leave the baby jeezus at home. Consider your friend or loved one as a human being - like you. Judge them not on their attractions, but on their humanity. Think about what you want for your life - then apply it to theirs.

It's truly the "christian" thing to do. But don't be offended if you find people of other faiths - or none at all - standing up for queer folks. Because ultimately - in case you missed the sarcasm - this isn't even about religion. It's about people, and love, and doing the right thing. All of which supersede religion. Orientation, like marriage, isn't about religion at all. It's about people.

We're here, and we're queer. So, once again, get used to it. We aren't going anywhere. And we sure as hell aren't going back in the goddamn closet.